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If anyone has any suggestions or something you want me to talk about send me an email.  I have the tendency to be opinionated so I won't let you down.  I will even use your name, yes you will be immortalized on the Internet for everyone to see.  I was thinking about it and I have a decent amount of ideas but as I move forward I might need a little help.


Also if there is anything you all want to see added to the site to make navigating easier please let me know.  I am always looking for new widgets to add to increase the entertainment for my readers.  I was concerned I would be embarrassed by putting my thoughts out there for the world to see but I have received nothing but support so anything I can do for you let me know.  The "Contact" page is only a click away.

Here is a picture of my parents dog, Reese.  Haven't made any posts about him but it is only a matter of time.  Best dog in the world.


And... I'm... Back...

Ok, so I have been all over the place during the past week so I haven't really had time to get any of these posts done. This city never disappoints though, always something new and annoying to write about. The whole process of a guy yelling or whistling at a girl out of a car window has been going on forever. I know, every stand up comedian has made a joke about how guys do this but it really does happen. Well, either that or blasting music with bass shaking the ground to try to get the attention of a female. I mean, what girl wouldn't flock to a car playing hip hop so loud it shakes their glass on the table. I really haven't seen it work though. I have never actually tried yelling out to a girl out the window but I am not saying I haven't stared and almost run into a tree. I guess you would have to yell out to a girl, have her see you, proceed to stop the car on the side of the street and wait for the girl to come over. Seems a little complicated to me and I feel like that would work maybe 1 out of 1,000 times... if ever. I have, however, yelled at other cars from my car when they are doing something I find unacceptable. The window is usually closed, but still. If someone on foot is close enough to hear you yelling something at them where they actually understand you, they are either too close or actually under the car. It just kind of seems like the cowards way out to yell at someone on the street, be it for a date or to express some form of hatred.

This obviously brings me to the point of today's entry. So I left my apartment this morning and I didn't really look at the forecast but figured it was going to be disgustingly hot. I have a very casual work environment so I don't have to dress up and try to be as comfortable as possible. My eyes were half closed even after the shower and I was still worn out from the weekend so I just threw on a t-shirt and jeans. It is a superstition to wear my Yankee hat to work at this point also so I just threw that on and walked out the door. To my surprise, I didn't walk into a wall of heat when I left my building so that put me in a good mood off the bat... well for at least a minute. I started my walk to work and was stopped at a light when I was about to cross the street a couple blocks from my apartment. A car then passed me and slowed down. Right then I heard the guy in the car yell... "BOO!!!" Does this happen to people other than me? I was being heckled on the streets of Manhattan at 7:15 in the morning. I am guessing it was because of my Yankee hat but it actually made me stop and look in the window of a building to make sure I looked normal. The car had New York plates also. It wasn't like I was walking down the streets of Boston in my Yankee hat. It is the All Star Break also, so it wasn't like the Yankees were playing the Mets tonight either. I was more confused than anything. Some guy actually wanted to make his point so known that he rolled down the window and yelled at me. He looked like a fat slob anyway so I wasn't terribly concerned. I am sure he just knew he wouldn't have been able to do this on foot because he was scared of me... yeah, I said it. Regardless, I guess there is always a first for everything but the city never ceases to amaze me.

I really wish it wasn't so early in the morning that my eyes were half closed or I would have had so much more detail about this situation.  At 7 in the morning even I am too tired to hate anyone.  This kind of thing drops out of the blue though.  A year or so ago was the first time I ever witnessed someone say anything about Jewish people in real life.  I believe the sentence was, "I would never let my daughter date a Jewish guy."  But I shouldn't be surprised anymore, people really don't care how they come off.  I just thought when someone wanted to be so blatant about something they just talked behind peoples backs.  I mean, that is what I do.  It isn't like I get mad at things like this though, I just get confused.  Hating an entire group of people is cool I guess.  I need to get on that because I am really missing out on something.  Yes, I know overweight people tend to be a problem for me but that is because of real life problems.  But you never know, a member of the Yankees might have slept with this guys girlfriend... or maybe not.  I was watching that show Anger Management with Charlie Sheen and she could have been a "slump buster" and that would have made more sense.  Look it up, it is funny, I promise.  Don't hate me because I am beautiful, I was born that way and there is nothing I can do about it.  But hey, maybe it's just me.


If I Raced Against These Guys, I Could Have Won Also

Ok, so admittedly I don't know a whole lot about the upcoming Olympics.  There have been all kinds of Olympic trials on though that I mostly bypass when I am watching TV.  I mean, go USA... but it really isn't going to do anything for my life either way.  The only thing that has been forced down my throat during my life has been gymnastics.  Both of my sisters did gymnastics growing up so my whole family feels the need to watch it whenever it is on TV.  Needless to say, I go to another room.  I am just lucky my parents kept one in my room so I have somewhere else to go.  To make matters worse, my parents even made me do gymnastics for a year when I was growing up.  I remember jumping on the trampoline... that is all.  Well that and everyone getting a medal after the final event because "everyone is a winner."  We even had a balance beam in the basement of my parents house when we were growing up so my sisters could practice 24 hours a day.  This, unfortunately, brings up a memory that I must have blocked due to the severe nature of the crime.  Being the youngest child with two older sisters who liked gymnastics... well... I am just going to leave it at that, use your imagination.  All I am going to say is that my dad should have been a little more alarmed than I heard he was.  But anyway, they have all these trials where people are going for worlds records.  I might have this wrong but I feel like these records shouldn't count in the trials and only count in the actual Olympics.  I guess they officials don't agree with me though because I have been noticing a lot of emphasis on these records in the trials from what I have seen so far.

So I obviously missed the first 9 events of the decathlon.  I was at home with my parents watching whatever that last race is to complete the event.  There was this one guy that was going for the world record from what I noticed.  The race started and this guy that was supposed to win wasn't even near the front of the pack.  He started to inch up as the race went on and seemed to be in third as they were coming down the final stretch.  Then, all of a sudden, the guy in the lead stopped and pretty much just started walking.  Mind you, the race was still going.  The guy in second also seemed to slow down a little.  They let this guy get ahead of both of them and win.  The guy that was in first place ended up coming in third.  So yeah, that guy got the world record for the decathlon.  WHAT JUST HAPPENED???  From what I have been told my whole life, when you are in a race you are supposed to try to win.  This wasn't like one of those car races where you use a guy on your team to rocket you in to first place.  They just stopped and the guy in the lead decided to run the last part of the race pretty much backwards.  Now I didn't see any of the pre race stuff so I don't know why this would have even been an option but it obviously was.  I wasn't aware that was how you became a world record holder.  If all he needed to do was finish when he did, he still would have won the world record if he came in third.  I was so livid, I had to walk out of the room.  Maybe next year I will be in one of the events and when they start the race everyone else will just take a step and sit down indian style and let me have the win and brand new world record.  I am not sure how this didn't take integrity away from the record but apparently it didn't.  People started giving this guy all kinds of praise and I just kept getting more and more angry.  I don't care how great of a record this was, the guys who were ahead of him should have at least been men and finished where they were.  HE WAS IN THIRD!!!  I will now make sure when I see any event from the decathlon come on tv during the next Olympics to immediately change the channel and mock it accordingly.

There had to be something else going on.  I was so angry about the situation that I didn't sit around to hear any of the commentary after the race.  Maybe if I had watch ahead of time I would have been a little less disturbed by it but I don't know.  If just felt wrong.  I have never seen people, in an race that mattered, stop and let someone finish ahead of them.  I can have the record an event if everyone lets me win also and I can't stress that enough.  I seriously haven't watched another trial since that.  Take that, ratings.  But hey, maybe it's just me. 


Any insight is welcomed, I really want to know what happened there.


Locked Up Again... At Least They Almost Got Away

Ok, so I obviously like shows with more of a reality spin on them. I have mentioned that I liked the show Locked Up Abroad before but there are so many other shows out there with a similar attitude. That show tells you how to get away with smuggling drugs across the border but there are other shows out there that actually show you how to get away with murder. These shows always have the actual person that committed the crime, or at least that is what they lead you to believe. However, in my head, they are all real and I don't want to hear otherwise. I used to watch the show Operation Repo on TRUtv pretty much until a guy at work told me that it wasn't real and they were all actors. It killed the show for me so if anyone out there gets an idea to tell me the people on these shows are actors, I will be very angry. You won't like me when I am angry. It just always amazes me how in depth they let these people get when talking about their crime. I mean, bringing drugs over the border is one thing but when they have people telling you how they broke out of jail... that might be a little too much information. They even do re-enactments to show you how they were able to overpower the guards or how to be patient and monitor every move they make so you can kill them when you are about to get away. I guess it isn't for me to decide but I would definitely like to see the people who are in charge. I would be willing to guess they have a lot of tattoos.

The show I am talking about here is I Almost Got Away With It and it is a show about how people committed crimes and were on the run, for as much as 8 years, and eventually got caught for their crimes. Gotta love these new channels like TRUtv and ID tv.  In the beginning they let you know the crimes they got arrested for. They can range from armed robbery to multiple murders. Sometimes there are a group of people that were caught for the crime and they all blame it on each other to make them all seem innocent. It is pretty funny. Well, as the show goes on, they first show you how they got out of jail the first time. Sometimes they get caught again and manage to break out of jail again. You would think they took more of a look at them if they already escaped once. Not only do they go into step by step detail on how they managed to do it, they also act out how they were able to get it done. Makes prison guards seem surprisingly incompetent and so I am pretty sure they if I was ever put away, I would be able to easily escape. Just a good option just in case, I am too pretty to go to jail. Anyway, they then talk about their journey between getting out of prison and getting caught again. It seems like if you manage to get out of the state you are all good. Then all you have to do is forge a passport and get out of the country and you are all good. I mean, if you committed murder I doubt your family is really that important to you. All these people get caught though because of family. They either have a parent who is about to die or they miss their kids. They then go back to their home town and are surprised the police catch up with them. Well, that and when you offer a reward for capture in most of these home towns, people would turn in their own father. Long story short, if you kill someone, run and run very far away and never come home. Just something to keep in the old memory banks.

I can't emphasize this point enough, if you teach people how to commit a crime, they are going to take advantage of it. We are breeding like a superhuman type of criminal these days. They know exactly how to do something and where to go to get it done. Well, that and let people know that if they get caught for murder, they are only probably going to get a couple years in jail if there are no witnesses. I was watching American History X last night and Ed Norton's character only spends 3 years in jail for killing 2 guys in "self defense." His brother then lets you know if he had testified he would have gotten life. These things all add up to one thing in my head, if I am going to kill someone I just need to make sure no one is around and worst case I will get a couple years in jail. Doesn't sound so bad when you say it out loud... but you didn't hear any of this here. But hey, maybe it's just me.


Bravo... No, Seriously... Bravo!!

Ok, so I have to throw a positive post in here and there to appease the family.  High blood pressure is just not something I need to add to my bag of tricks.  Like I have said, I go out to grab lunch most days as long as I am not stuck at my desk... then I eat popcorn and go hungry.  The biggest problem about this is that I get stuck in my ways.  I have a tendency to be a little stubborn also so when someone mentions how much I go to one place for lunch all the time, it just makes me want to go more.  I know, I know... issues.  Recently I have been going to Bread and Butter every day because it is so close and the food is edible.  There are only so many turkey, swiss, avocado and honey mustard sandwiches I can eat.  I go in there and make sure I order the same thing from the same guy every day.  A bunch of the sandwiches have names so I figure if I make enough of a stink I can get that done.  Some of the names of the sandwiches are "Michael Jackson" and "Mel Gibson"... I mean, I am not an anti semitic pedophile so I have to have a chance, right?   I went in there today and got the sandwich but when I got back to my desk I found myself taking some of the turkey and tomato slices off... I am obviously getting a little tired of it.  There are only so many places I can go 5 days a week and still end up ordering it to my apartment over the weekend.  It takes a lot for me to throw praise like that to just about anything but here we go.

In a word... Bravo.  I know there are a million pizza places around the city but there is just something about the Bravo Pizza near my office that is special.  There are other ones in the city but I am pretty loyal.  That and if I need it delivered, this is the one that is in my area.  Lazy??  Well, maybe a little.  I go there and literally get one of two things every time I go and have yet to be let down.  It is a little more on the expensive side but it is worth every penny.  They have the best Margherita pizza I have eaten in the city.  I get two slices of that and a Lemon Diet Snapple each and every time I get pizza from there.  There is something about a slice of that pizza that is amazing.  Some guys from work go to another place in the middle of Union Square because it is cheaper... I would feel like I am cheating on them though and it just isn't as good.  Besides, I would rather pay the extra buck fifty a slice for theirs any day of the week.  The only problem is that when I use Seamless Web to order from there, Margherita slice isn't on the list so I usually revert to my second favorite.  They also have a really good chicken caesarsalad.  I know there really aren't that many ingredients but the dressing is so good.  That obviously means it is terrible for me but I need my food to taste good.  After all, I go to the gym so it all evens out, right?  They have the perfect amount of croutons in there so with each piece of chicken I can get one with it.  It's the little things.

When I go in there and wait in line, they know what I am going to order.  I am not sure if that means I go there too much or they just have really good memories.  I am guessing it is the former.  They are really nice there, then they hand me the box to go, they always call me "buddy."  There is also a really cute girl working the register.  She has given me the eye and a couple times ago when she handed me the receipt to sign, she "accidentally" rubbed up against my hand.  It is only a matter of time but I feel like all the other guys that work there act like her older brothers so this may take a little more effort.  I am not chubby anymore though, so at least I have that working for me but if I keep eating the food from there that may soon no longer be the case.  But hey, maybe it's just me.


P.S.  This Bravo Pizza is located on 20th and Park... check it out, I will be willing to go out on a limb and guarantee results as long as you order the right thing.


"Thank You" Contest...

Ok, so I guess I shouldn't really call this a contest because there are no prizes. Well, I guess the prizes are giving yourself piece of mind and possibly feeling good about yourself. That and having other people in the city thinking you aren't a complete a**hole. What I am trying to find out, in a nutshell, is how much of a good person each one of you are. I was thinking yesterday, as I was holding the door open for a couple people at work, about how many times I hear someone say "thank you" to me throughout the day. I even count the times where someone should have said it but are too ignorant to realize. I guess I never really thought about it before. I am not walking around and going out of my way to help people for the most part... it is just ingrained. If I see someone that needs help, I help them because that is what normal people do. It doesn't take a great deal of effort to help people when they are in need. Holding the door for someone takes all of 2 seconds, if that long. That is the one thing I have been noticing a lot recently. When I walk in or out of a building, I usually turn around to see if there is someone else following me so I can give the door a flip for them as I am walking through. People in my office building basically go out of their way to slide into the sliver of space they create when using as little effort as possibe to open the door. This essentially closes the door in the face of the person behind them. I expect it though so it doesn't surprise me. Common courtesy really is dead.

So here is what I am proposing. Pick one day this week and try to remember the amount of times people say "thank you" to you. Like I said above, you can also count the times people should have said it, so I will spot you that. Don't go out of your way though, just try to live your day as you would any other. You are only cheating yourself. I know, trusting people of New York City to go by the honor code is like someone not finishing their 3rd Big Mac for their mid day snack... but I will give it a go anyway. As much as people out there might think I am a bitter, angry person, I would say I hear someone say "thank you" to me as least 5 times a day. I migh have my moments but I really try not to take it out on other people in the heat of the moment... sometimes I try and fail but at least I do try.  The scoring system will be like this...

0 - You are just like the average New Yorker, a complete waste of space.

1-3 - As much as I hate to say it, impressive. Not that impressive but at least you shouldn't look at yourself like a complete d*ick.

3-5 - This is where I usually fall in, so I would have to say you are close to perfect. Well... at least a nice person that cares about people around them. I mean, people walk in and out of doorways tens of times a day if not more and, inevitably, there is going to be someone walking behind you which is an easy point.

6+ - Doubtful you are following the honor code but even a broken clock is right twice a day. Had to slip that saying in somewhere because it was on my mind. Pretty sure it doesn't fit in this situation but it sounds cool at least. But, go you. Sometimes you just don't get the chance to get this done but I am not saying it is impossible. It should make you feel good to hear someone say "thank you" to you and this kind of person obviously understands that.

Obviously people aren't going to keep track of this on a day to day basis but at least you are thinking about it now, right?  But that is all I am really trying to do with this blog... try to make people realize where they can make changes in their lives to make this city a little more manageable place to live.  People can make this a contest in their lives and try to make themselves a better person.  I am not perfect in the slightest bit, but you can't say I am not trying.  All I am looking for is a little effort.

The fact that this even came to me says a lot.  I have no problem saying "thank you" to people and sometimes I wish people would give me a chance to say it more often.  If people put more thought into getting compliments maybe they would not wander around the city looking like an idiot.  Visitors are a lost cause but if you live here is it different.  If you were to give someone a criticism when you see them do something they shouldn't be doing, they should thank you and not give you a dirty look but that is the world we live in.  I was walking around the city today after lunch and it was crowded.  Some guy thought he was cool and tried sliding in and out of people to get where he was going.  He almost knocked an eldery couple into the street.  He was just causing people to get disoriented and slowing things down even more.  I took it on myself to put a stop to it.  He was trying to swerve around me but I just stood there and kinda nudged him... with my chest.  Glad I have been going to the gym because after it happened we both turned and looked at each other.  I have always kind of wanted to punch someone in the face but I don't think it would turn out well for me so, for now, I will hold off.  But it is like Brad Pitt said in Fight Club... how much can you really know about yourself if you haven't been in a fight?  I said "thank you" to him so I probably made his day, he was rocketed into the 1-3 range.  But hey, maybe it's just me.


Go ahead... tell me the holes in my plan and how bad of a person I am...  Bring it...

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